Episode 173 -Pens and Markers Are Cheaper Than Therapy: Using Doodles to Transform Self-Talk with Michelle Keil
Discover the surprising power of doodling for women's mental health, self-compassion, and personal growth with coach Michelle Keil
Have you ever wished you could quiet that harsh inner critic that seems to have taken up permanent residence in your head? What if I told you that something as simple as doodling could help you do exactly that—and so much more?
In this episode of the Seasons of Joy Podcast, I sat down with Michelle Keil, affectionately known as the "Doodle Coach," to explore how this surprisingly powerful tool is helping overwhelmed women reconnect with their true selves and find grace in the margins of their lives.
Meet Michelle Keil: The Doodle Coach
Michelle Keil is a master certified holistic coach and creator of a unique coaching method that combines creativity, faith, and nervous system-aware coaching. As a wife of 34 years, mother of six (plus two chosen kids), and grandmother to one "perfect granddaughter," Michelle understands the complexities of women's lives firsthand.
Her journey to coaching began in 2007 but didn't fully take shape until 2020, when a combination of life changes—including helping her mother through her final months during COVID—led her to pursue certification through the Life Coach School. Since then, she's added advanced certifications in motherhood and family life, master coach training, and doodling certification to her toolkit.
The Problem: Our Relationship with Ourselves
"I jokingly say that I help women hate themselves less," Michelle shares. While her son suggests she reframe this to "helping women love themselves more," Michelle explains why her original phrasing resonates: "The truth of the matter is women don't even know what that looks like—to love themselves more. A lot of times they don't even realize how much they don't like themselves until we have a conversation about their self-talk."
This harsh inner dialogue—what Michelle calls the "inner critic"—is something most women wouldn't tolerate from another person, yet they accept it as normal from themselves. This negative self-talk becomes particularly problematic when we're overwhelmed or stressed, as our nervous system shifts into a state where healthy cognitive work becomes nearly impossible.
How Doodling Helps: The Science and Practice
Nervous System Regulation
One of the most powerful aspects of doodling is its ability to regulate the nervous system. "When your brain shifts into that hyper, anxiety, spiraling thoughts, the patterns that so many of us have," Michelle explains, "putting that on a page and using doodling actually engages a different part of our brain. And so it quiets down all of those anxious thoughts and feelings so that we can move more into cognitive work."
Personifying the Inner Critic
Michelle uses a particularly effective technique where clients create doodles that represent their inner critic. "I love personifying that part of ourself," she says. "So creating a doodle that is that mean girl, and some of the things that she says, and having a conversation on paper with that mean girl."
This process creates healthy separation between the person and their critical thoughts, helping them recognize that "That is not who I am. That is just what's showing up in my brain right now."
Michelle has even created what she calls a "boardroom of people" in her brain, including characters like "Miss Whatifington" (the worry voice) and "Tammy Tough Love" (the harsh motivator). By giving these voices names and visual representations, they lose their power to control our emotional state.
Breaking Down the Barriers: You Don't Need to Be Artistic
The biggest resistance Michelle encounters is the belief that "I'm not artistic" or "I'm not creative." She addresses this directly with a powerful distinction: "Doodling has nothing to do with artistic. There is creativity involved... but creativity and artistry are not the same thing."
Drawing from President Uchtdorf's teachings about our inherent creative nature and Charles Dickens' insight that "a thing created is loved before it exists," Michelle helps women understand that creativity is about making something that didn't exist before—whether that's a meal, a safe space for others, or simply marks on a page that help process emotions.
The "This is Me" Exercise: A Powerful Self-Acceptance Tool
One of the most impactful exercises Michelle describes involves drawing a simple doodle self with a dotted line down the middle. On one side, participants write things they like about themselves, things they're proud of. On the other side, they write things they don't like or want to change.
The powerful part comes next: writing "I love and accept myself" on both sides.
"One of the women was like, 'I was having a good day. I didn't realize what came up for me when you suggested I write down, I love and accept myself on a piece of paper. My brain immediately shifted to Do I love and accept myself?'"
This exercise reveals how difficult it is for most women to practice self-acceptance, especially regarding their perceived flaws or areas for growth.
The Journey to Self-Discovery: Removing Layers, Not Adding Them
Michelle's approach isn't about changing who you are—it's about "uncovering who is underneath all the layers of things that have been put upon us." Using Michelangelo's famous approach to sculpting David—"I just took away all the pieces that weren't him"—she helps women identify and release societal expectations, internalized beliefs, and imposed roles that don't serve them.
This process of removal rather than addition is particularly relevant for women who have been conditioned to prioritize everyone else's needs above their own. As Michelle notes, "Self-care feels selfish. Saying no to someone goes against all of the things that we've been taught."
The Humility Connection: CS Lewis and Self-Acceptance
Michelle shares one of her favorite quotes from CS Lewis: "Humility is not thinking less of yourself. It's thinking about yourself less." This reframe is crucial for understanding healthy self-acceptance.
When we can accept both our strengths and weaknesses without constantly trying to prove our worth or defend our flaws, we free up mental and emotional energy to focus on serving others and living with purpose.
Practical Steps to Get Started
For those ready to begin their own doodling journey, Michelle offers simple guidance:
Start with gentle curiosity: Ask yourself, "I wonder who I am without all of these expectations?"
Be willing to be bad at it: Let go of perfectionism and artistic expectations
Practice self-acceptance where you are: Instead of waiting until you "fix" yourself, try accepting yourself as you are right now
Make marks on the page: Don't worry about what it looks like—focus on what comes up
The Bigger Picture: From Self-Care to Service
Michelle's work, featured in the upcoming book "She Rises: The Insight and Wisdom of the Women of the Masterful Coach Collective," addresses a fundamental truth: women are not broken or flawed. The challenges they face are human experiences, not character defects.
Her chapter, titled "Discover Your True Self through Doodles Because Pens and Markers Are Cheaper Than Therapy," emphasizes that learning to care for ourselves isn't selfish—it's essential. When we develop the skill of self-compassion, we become more capable of serving others from a place of abundance rather than depletion.
Taking Action: Your Next Steps
If this conversation resonates with you, consider these immediate actions:
Start a doodle practice: Grab a pen and paper and simply make marks while asking yourself, "What's showing up for me today?"
Name your inner critic: Give that negative voice a name and visual representation to create healthy separation
Practice the "This is Me" exercise: Draw yourself and explore both your strengths and growth areas with equal acceptance
Ask yourself: "I wonder who I am without all these expectations?"
Connect with Michelle Keil
You can find Michelle at:
Website: thedoodlecoach.com
Social Media: Instagram and Facebook
Upcoming: Monthly Doodle Lab classes (check her website for details)
Book Launch: The link to join the Launch Information/ First to know list for her new book “She Rises” which is launching at the end of the month - https://thedoodlecoach.com/launch-team
The Bottom Line
Michelle Keil's approach to coaching through doodling offers something many traditional methods miss: a way to bypass our cognitive defenses and connect directly with our authentic selves. In a world that constantly tells women to be more, do more, and give more, her message is refreshingly different: you are enough, exactly as you are, right now.
As she beautifully puts it, referencing Charles Dickens: we are creations that have been loved since before we existed. Learning to see ourselves through that lens—through doodles, through self-compassion, through gentle curiosity—might just be the key to quieting that inner critic once and for all.
The next time that harsh voice starts up in your head, remember Michelle's advice: grab a pen, make some marks on a page, and ask yourself, "I wonder who I am without all these expectations?" The answer might surprise you.
Keywords: inner critic, self-compassion, doodling for mental health, women's coaching, nervous system regulation, self-acceptance, personal growth, Michelle Keil, doodle coach, creativity and healing
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About the Host: Jill Pack is a certified faith-based life + relationship coach and member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. She helps women of faith navigate their seasons of life with greater purpose and joy including how to transform conflict into connection. For more resources or to work with Jill, visit www.seasons-coaching.com.
