Episode 190 - From Surviving to Thriving in Your Next Chapter with Jody Moore
A Full Circle Moment
Have you ever felt lost in transition? Like the roles you've played for decades are shifting, and you're not quite sure who you are anymore? If you're nodding along, you're not alone—and this conversation is for you.
In this episode of Seasons of Joy, I sat down with life coach Jody Moore, the woman who first introduced me to transformational coaching over a decade ago. This was truly a full-circle moment, as Jody's work set me on the path that led to my own coaching practice and the work I do today with midlife women.
Jody Moore is a life and business coach who has been serving clients for over 12 years. She's the author of "Better Than Happy" and host of the Better Than Happy podcast. With four children—two now in college—Jody is navigating the same midlife transitions many of us face.
How Jody Moore Became a Life Coach: A Story of "Selfish" Decisions
From Corporate Trainer to Life Coach
While working in sales training and leadership development in corporate, Jody was exposed to coaching tools that went far beyond traditional corporate advice about writing people up or offering incentives.
"This kind of coaching was much deeper," Jody explained. "It was like, let's understand what's going on for you and how you are contributing to this problem and your own development and growth."
The Pivotal Moment
Then life threw Jody several curveballs at once. The company laid off a large portion of the staff, including her. She was struggling in her marriage, with her health, and with her own personal growth—all while still having babies.
"I was kind of lost thinking, okay, I just got laid off from this job I'd had for 15 years," Jody recalled. "My husband was working, but his career wasn't very stable yet. I've just left going, wait, am I gonna stay home with these kids now? Am I gonna get another job?"
The only thing Jody felt sure about was her draw to coaching. When Brooke Castillo opened her first-ever in-person coach training in 2012, Jody knew she had to go—even though it would cost significant money and require major sacrifice with young children at home.
The Power of Following Your Desires
"That was a decision that for me at the time, felt very selfish," she admitted. "It was like, I wanna do this thing 'cause I'm lit up about it and I don't know what else to do."
But that "selfish" decision has led to over 12 years of service, countless lives transformed, and a ripple effect that continues today—including in my own life and practice.
"Following what I would've called a selfish desire back then led to exactly like you said, a lot of good that I've been able to do in the world," Jody reflected.
Learn more about moving from surviving to thriving in your next chapter.
Surviving vs. Thriving: Navigating Midlife Transitions
The Struggle with Change
As women who work primarily with midlife clients, Jody and I both understand the unique challenges of this life stage. And Jody was refreshingly honest about her own history with transitions.
"I have a track record of really struggling with transitions," she admitted, describing how even graduating from college left her feeling lost and uncertain.
The pattern continued through various life stages—getting married, having babies, career changes. But with each transition, Jody learned something valuable about the difference between surviving and thriving.
What Keeps Us in Survival Mode
During our conversation, we explored what keeps midlife women stuck in survival mode rather than thriving:
1. We're tied to roles instead of connected to ourselves
"I wonder if when we are tied to roles that we play and we don't know who we are—I'm a wife and a mother, I am a professional—when that transition comes and we kind of lose our identity in a way," I shared. "During those roles, it's hard to want because we're focusing on being this thing."
2. We've disconnected from our desires
"What I see a lot of women do is their wants get set so far aside that they don't even know what they are anymore," Jody observed. "They're like, I don't even know what I like. Because they've just put everything into what everybody else wants for them or expect of them."
3. We label our desires as "selfish"
Many of us have been conditioned to view our own wants as less important than everyone else's needs. But as Jody's story proves, this mindset can actually prevent us from serving others at our highest capacity.
Reconnecting with Your Desires: The Key to Thriving
Your Wants Are God-Given Information
One of the most powerful themes in our conversation was about honoring your desires—not dismissing them.
"Our desires are God-given," Jody emphasized. "And I do worry about women constantly shutting that down."
She addressed the common objection: "The counter argument is, well, if we all just do what we want, who's gonna serve? Who's gonna volunteer in the schools? Who's gonna help the sick and the needy?"
Her response? "We want to be people who want to serve also. It's not one or the other."
Your Desires Matter Just as Much
Jody offered a beautiful framework for balancing your wants with others' needs:
"Of course, as I'm raising kids or in my marriage, whatever, I wanna know what my kids want and what does my husband want, and in my business, like what do my clients want? All of that's relevant information for me, but my wants are just as relevant."
She continued: "My desires actually are the most important information for me. And followed by that is then what everybody else around me wants in whatever given role I'm in."
The Cost of Ignoring Your Desires
What happens when we constantly push aside what we want?
"If you've just been ignoring it, constantly going, no, no, no, we don't have time, we don't have money, we think about that. That's wrong. You shouldn't want that. It's like having a child," Jody explained. "If you said that to a child over and over and over again, you would erode that relationship."
The result? We end up "lacking integrity, resenting everyone. It's not real connection, it's not honesty. It's not genuine and it feels awful."
Building a Stronger Relationship with Yourself
Why Self-Connection Changes Things
As I've grown in understanding what I want and what I want to create in my life, I've noticed something powerful: "It helps me interact with people better. It helps me have more confidence. It helps me in all these other areas because of the wanting, because of the creating and the growing."
Jody validated this experience: "When you start reconnecting with it, you're actually reconnecting with yourself. What do you want, hun? What do you think? What do you like? What do you not like?"
She offered this profound insight: "Everything in life gets easier when you have a solid connection with yourself."
How to Start Reconnecting
The process of reconnecting with yourself begins with curiosity:
What do you want?
What do you think?
What do you like?
What do you not like?
Jody emphasized that asking these questions doesn't mean you'll grant yourself every desire—just like you wouldn't grant your child every request. But you need to know what's there. "That's a healthy relationship."
Finding Hope in Your Next Chapter
It's Never Too Late
As we wrapped up our conversation, I asked Jody what she would offer to help people find hope in this next chapter. Her answer was simple but powerful:
"It's never too late. It's never too late to reconnect with yourself. It's never too late to learn these things that we're talking about here."
The Perfect Timing
Jody often hears from midlife clients, "Oh, I wish I would've known this when I was younger."
Her response? "No, no, no. If you were supposed to know it when you were younger, you would've found it when you were younger. This is the perfect time 'cause it's showing up in your life right now."
The Transformative Power of Coaching
Both Jody and I believe deeply in the power of working with a skilled coach to navigate these transitions. As Jody put it:
"Give yourself the gift of working with a coach who's highly skilled and has done this work herself, guide you through an exploration of what's going on in your mind and how that's affecting every area of your life. I'm telling you, it's transformative."
Key Takeaways for Thriving in Midlife
Here are the essential insights from this conversation:
Your "selfish" desires can lead to service - Following what lights you up often creates the greatest impact
Surviving isn't the same as thriving - Don't settle for just getting through transitions
Your wants are as important as everyone else's - This isn't selfish; it's healthy
Reconnecting with yourself transforms everything - Your relationship with yourself affects all other relationships
It's never too late - If this message is showing up in your life now, it's the perfect time
Take the Next Step
If you resonated with anything in this conversation, I encourage you to work with a coach (like myself or or someone else like Jody).
The important thing is to take action. As Jody said, "Dive in somewhere and try something."
Your next chapter is waiting—and it can be more than just surviving. You can thrive.
About the Guest:
Jody Moore is a life and business coach, author of "Better Than Happy," and host of the Better Than Happy podcast. She specializes in helping people navigate life challenges including relationships, health goals, habits, and personal growth. Jody also trains and mentors other coaches in building their businesses. With over 12 years of coaching experience, she offers everything from free resources to high-touch programs. Learn more at www.jodymoore.com
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About the Host: Jill Pack is a certified faith-based life + relationship conflict coach and member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. She helps women of faith navigate their seasons of life with greater purpose and joy including how to transform conflict into connection. For more resources or to work with Jill, visit www.seasons-coaching.com.
Keywords: midlife transitions, life coaching for women, empty nest syndrome, finding purpose after kids leave, reconnecting with yourself, thriving vs surviving, Jody Moore, Better Than Happy, midlife identity crisis, selfish vs selfless, desires and wants, relationship with self, women's life coaching
