Episode 99 - Healing Trauma with Cami Birdno
Episode 99 - Healing Trauma with Cami Birdno
Hello, my friends!
Welcome to this week’s podcast. I am so excited to be here and to share this week’s episode with you.
But first 2 fun announcements:
One, I finally have more detailed information to share with you about my upcoming one day workshop called, "Navigating Midlife with Grace: Strengthening Connections with Yourself, Others, and God.” I beyond excited to share this with you. The purpose of this workshop is to help empower women of faith in the midseason of life as they work on deepening their relationships with themselves, others, and God, and providing them with practical tools and strategies to do just that. This is an opportunity to gather with other women of faith in a safe and supportive space to share experiences, and connect with one another.
This is an in-person workshop and it will be held on March 23rd from 9 am - 3 pm in Cache Valley, Utah, just about 10 miles outside of Logan, Utah.
Do you feel:
Unsure of your purpose now that your children are raised?
Unsure of what you even like to do anymore?
Unsure how to interact with your adult children?
Unsure how to connect with your spouse now that you are the only two at home?
Unsure of how to connect with God when you are feeling so lost?
If this sounds like you, you don’t want to miss this amazing opporunity.
You will get:
A full day of comprehensive, hands-on workshopping
A deep dive into ways to help you strengthen connection in your relationships.
We will be focusing on the relationships you have with yourself, others, and God.
We will be incorporating mindfulness and restorative practices throughout the workshop to provide you opportunities to be still and reflect on what you are learning.
There will be multiple opportunities to be coached or watch coaching live. This provides the opportunity to actually see the concepts you will be learning applied to real circumstances.
You can learn more about my Navigating Midseason with Grace by visiting my website: www.seasons-coaching.com/workshops.
Registration is open but limited to 35 women and I would love you to be one of them.
My second announcement is about my 100th podcast episode that will be dropping next Tuesday, February 27th!
This is so exciting to me. I began this journey almost two years ago, I could have never believed that it would possible for me to really make it this far. Thank you for being here with me on this journey. So, as you know, I want to do something special to celebrate. I am going to give away one FREE registration to my Navigating Midlife with Grace workshop in March. You will have to listen to next week’s episode to see how to enter to win.
Now on to this week’s episode.
This week on the podcast, I am sharing my conversation with fellow life coach and friend, Cami Birdno.
This was such a beautiful conversation.
Having experienced trauma herself, Cami helps women heal sexual and complex trauma so they can feel confident in their bodies and relationships.
I am so glad there is someone out there like Cami helping people heal.
You are going to love this conversation.
Don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast and rate and leave me a review! Help me spread these tools!
You can learn more about Cami here:
https://camibirdno.com/
https://www.instagram.com/camibirdnocoaching/
https://www.facebook.com/camibirdnocoaching/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/cami-birdno-trauma-coach/
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/go-all-in-to-let-go/id1660128135
Mentioned in the podecast:
Register HERE for my in-person workshop, Navigating Midlife with Grace: Strengthening Connection with Self, Others, and God.
Listen to learn more!Are you ready to take what I teach to a deeper level? I would love to be your coach!
Click HERE to schedule a FREE Clarity Call with me to learn more.
Grab my recent Strengthening Your Relationship with God During the Holidays Workshop.
Grab the 5 Day Relationship Reboot Challenge Workbook HERE.
For another great FREE resource, grab my Mending the Rift: Repairing Relationships with Adult Children.
Click on the following links to learn more about Seasons Coaching and my Seasons of Joy Community Facebook Group.
Click HERE to learn more about my Season of Creation 12-Week 1:1 Coaching package.
To contact me about speaking to your group or business, email me at jill@seasons-coaching.com.
Don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast and rate and leave me a review! Help me spread these tools!
Auto Generated Transcript:
Welcome to this week's podcast.
I am so excited to be here and share this week's episode with you.
But before I get started,
I wanted to share with you two fun announcements.
The first one is that I finally have more detailed information to share with you about my upcoming one day workshop called Navigating Midlife with grace,
strengthening connections with yourself,
others and God.
I am beyond excited to share this with you.
The purpose of this workshop is to help empower women of faith.
In the mid season of life as they work on deepening their relationships with themselves,
with others and with God and providing them with practical tools and strategies to do just that.
This is an opportunity to gather with other women of faith in a safe and supportive space to share experiences and to connect with one another.
This is an in person workshop and it will be held on March 23rd from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. in Cash Valley,
Utah,
just about 10 miles outside of Logan Utah.
Do you feel unsure of your purpose now that your Children are raised?
Do you feel unsure of what you even like to do anymore?
Do you feel unsure about how to act or interact with your adult Children?
Do you feel unsure how to connect with your spouse now that you are the only two at home?
And do you feel unsure how to connect with God when you're feeling so lost?
If this sounds like you,
I don't want you to miss this amazing opportunity.
If you come to this workshop,
you are going to get a full day of comprehensive hands on works,
shopping,
a deep dive into ways to help you strengthen connection in your relationships.
We're going to be focusing on the relationships you have with yourself,
with others and with God.
And we're going to be incorporating mindfulness and restorative practices throughout the workshop to provide you opportunities to be still and reflect on what you're learning.
There are going to be multiple opportunities to be coached and watch coaching live.
This provides you the opportunity to actually see the concepts that you're going to be learning applied to real circumstances.
So you can learn more about my navigating Midea with Grace Workshop by visiting my website WW dot seasons coaching.com backslash workshops.
Registration is now open but it is limited to 35 women and I would love to have you be one of them.
My second announcement is about my 100th podcast episode.
I've been alluding to this for a few weeks now,
the time has finally arrived,
that 100th episode is going to be dropping next Tuesday,
February 27th.
So keep your eye out for that.
This is so exciting to me and I began this journey almost two years ago and I could never have believed that it would be possible for me to really make it this far.
Thank you for being here with me on this journey.
I so appreciate it.
So as you know,
I want to do something special to celebrate.
So I'm going to be giving away one free registration to my navigating midlife with Grace Workshop in March.
You're going to have to listen to next week's episode,
the 100th episode to get all the details on how to enter to win.
So now on to this week's episode this week on the podcast,
I'm sharing my conversation with fellow life coach and friend,
Cammy Bena.
This was such a beautiful conversation and having experienced trauma herself,
Cammy helps women heal sexual and complex trauma so that they can feel confident in their own bodies and their relationships.
I'm so glad that there is someone out there like Cammy,
helping people heal.
You're going to love this conversation.
All right.
Um Welcome to the podcast.
I am here with my friend and fellow coach colleague,
Cammy Bena and I'm so excited to have her join me today on the podcast.
And the fun thing about Cammy is we knew each other before we both decided we were gonna be life coaches.
Well,
I should say we both decided we weren't gonna be life coaches.
Yes,
that's right.
And we are so,
um,
anyway,
I'm gonna turn the time over to Cammy and let her introduce herself.
Tell us a little about you,
Cammy.
And then what led you on this path?
Yeah,
sure thing.
Thank you so much for having me,
Jill.
Yeah,
this is so fun and it is really so fun to come back together because we haven't chatted since we had both said we weren't going to be life coaches.
We were just there to learn and all the things,
right?
So it is really fun to just see our past and our journeys.
And so,
yeah,
just a little bit about me like I am an Arizona girl and I'm an Arizona Mountain girl.
So most people think of Arizona and think of the desert and we live in the mountains and I love it.
I love that because part of my happy place is getting outside and that's where I do a lot of my processing of trauma.
And so,
yeah,
I am now a trauma coach and kind of what led me to that um was actually first like you and I met doing a thing for Jody Moore.
And so she and doing live coaching was kind of like my first step because I was so deep in trauma that I only had black and white thinking and I could only see things one way,
right?
So being able to go to her thing and being coached first with Jody started to open up my mindset to where I could start to believe this whole idea of Anne's and both and nuance.
And for me,
that was like the bedrock that my trauma needed to be able to come forth because it tried to come.
So my experience is that mine was all repressed and suppressed,
so repressed means that the memories were so difficult for me that they were shoved down in my unconscious,
that I couldn't remember them at all.
And then suppressed means that there were times that like certain images or certain things would start to come up and I would think I was crazy for one and be like,
did that really happen to me?
Like I can't believe any of that is really true and I would deliberately shove them down,
right?
So that's like the suppressing.
Um And so it started,
then,
you know,
my trauma was trying to get out because our trauma is never meant to stay in our bodies.
Um But it kept trying and there was no space that wasn't safe for it to come out,
like within my own system,
within my mind,
my heart,
my body,
my spirit,
none of it like it wasn't safe.
And so coaching is what started to open up that pathway.
And then I started to realize once coaching happened.
And then actually,
I took a course from Jennifer Finlayson Fife.
And I don't know if you heard of her or her,
any of your audience,
but she teaches a course called art of Desire.
And it's a sexuality course,
but it's also just a starting to own your desires.
And I had suppressed that whole part of me too.
Like I didn't have desires,
I didn't really want to do anything.
I would just do whatever anybody suggested.
Like I really did not have my own mind,
my own self.
Um And so taking her class and starting to have like the deep questions that she offered and realizing what my go to was actually is what.
And because I'd had coaching and had the ability for this ans in both is what actually made it a safe place.
And all my trauma actually came up when I was taking her course.
Um And I had,
you know,
just things open up these floodgates of memories of sensations,
of all sorts of things happening.
And then I started to realize,
you know,
I have these great reframes now with coaching,
but like my body is responding in a totally different way and it's not making sense and I can't even like get my body to believe anything that I can think.
And so that's when I started to realize,
oh,
trauma is not just a mind thing.
Like we need the education we need,
um they call it top down.
So we need to understand and have the ability to look at and and both and not be so black and white.
And we need to have the education of what is happening in our body and trauma.
But like we need what's called body based bottom up type of modalities to be able to find the different places.
The trauma is stored in our bodies and actually release it and get it out of our body.
And so that is kind of what has led me to where I am now and being able to combine coaching with this body based stuff.
And then I also bring on what I call a sideways,
which is very powerful to start recognizing how we're viewing ourselves,
both what we're thinking about and how our body is responding.
Because if we're super judgmental,
super shameful,
we actually can cause our trauma to get stuck again or we hinder its ability to complete its energy cycle and get out of our body.
And so I really focus on this sideways and learning to be compassionate and mindful and those type of things.
So I love that.
I love that so much.
Yeah.
Well,
and we were talking beforehand and I said this is probably one of the more serious conversations that,
that I've had on this podcast.
But I think it's very needed.
I think that we hear more and more about trauma informed and somatic healing and things like that.
And so I think it's a very relevant and needed topic and,
and I thought you would be perfect for this.
So I'm so glad that you're,
that you're joining me and you're using your experience to bless other people,
which I think is,
is beautiful because you understand the nuances of all of it.
Um I know with my clients too,
I think,
like you said,
I love how you said the sideways because I really think that that is sometimes we overlook that piece like when we're,
when we're trying to make progress in our life,
whether it's trauma or big tea or little tea trauma,
right?
Um It's,
we've got to have that self compassion and love and acceptance to be able to move through whatever's going to help you move to healing,
right?
We've got to include that or I,
I love how you explain that it just blocks you from,
from moving forward when you don't combine that.
Yeah,
exactly.
And I think it's,
can I just add one thing real fast?
I think it's super powerful that you brought in the big T and the little tea,
right?
Because lots of times,
um,
and in fact,
if you look in the trauma world,
like people will tell you there's no way any person can go throughout their life without experience some form of trauma,
right?
And there's,
and it does come in so many different forms and just starting to recognize like the big t is really like what everybody would say.
Oh yeah,
that's traumatic.
But also knowing that even the big T some people will be traumatized by that experience and some people won't,
right?
It's so individualized.
And then the same thing with the little teas,
those are the things that are so minimal that we minimize all the time because they happen and we can't pinpoint one thing.
And,
you know,
and I personally have both in my experience of trauma,
right?
And so being able to work through both of those,
it's different and yet the same because um it's the same in the fact that our body is what teaches us how to heal.
So the tools that I offer and teach my clients are being able to learn how your body has responded in trauma because that information is also the exact way that your body will help you get out of trauma and it's such a beautiful thing to learn to come home to your body because I was scared to death of my body.
Yeah.
That's interesting.
Yeah.
Speak to that a little bit.
Like,
do you have a like an example of where somebody,
one way their body was kind of dealing with the trauma but how it did in turn come full circle and help them heal.
I have a real example and I'll go ahead and give one of mine just because each client,
I like to let their experience be theirs,
right?
And their words be theirs.
Um But for me,
like,
so for instance,
with Jody,
right,
when she would even be talking about feelings and things like that,
like I,
you know,
was so numbed out to my body.
That was my experience.
I,
like I said,
I suppressed.
So I went into a lot of freeze and what is called the fawn where the fawn is like,
you're still in this mode of freezing yourself,
but you're able to pretend and you're able to people please and you're able to appease everybody else and you look like you're fine and like there's not a problem,
right?
And so I had shut down all my emotions and like had totally like,
it was really hard for me to even get this whole idea in the coaching world of like a feeling and what that means.
Like,
I'm like,
I don't feel anything from like here down and like anything from here is just like spiraling and swirling and crazy all the time,
right?
And so um so for me,
that was kind of the one experience first of just being like,
I don't know what you're talking about.
Like when people would say like I feel anxiety or I feel sadness in my chest,
I literally didn't feel anything like I was like,
there's nothing there.
Like I was so disconnected from my body.
And so then when my trauma surfaced and I was flooded with all of these emotions,
right?
Then that was terrifying because I only,
again,
which makes sense because I only knew the black and white,
I knew no feeling or I knew this overwhelming feeling that took control of my body.
And it was so scary.
Both of those were so scary,
right?
This whole to realize like I can totally numb out.
People can see things happening in my body that I actually literally can't see and definitely can't feel like I would be shaking and because it's like that whole like beach ball type concept,
right?
Where you're holding stuff down and I was trying to hold everything down so hard that like it literally physiologically made my body start shaking,
but I couldn't see it.
I couldn't see that that was happening,
right?
So I was so numbed out to that um and had experiences where people helped me see,
like they would hold my hands and let their hands go limp and kind of shake with my own.
And I would be like,
oh that's me.
Like I'm really causing that shaking,
you know,
type of a thing that was just scary for me to see.
And then so then the tools then of starting to like very slowly in trauma,
we take things very slowly.
Peter Levine talks about like you chip away at it,
like you go into it safely,
chip a little piece and then come back out and you learn tools to then go in a little more.
You never go headlong into trauma because then you're just in trauma mode again,
right?
So the tools are to go slowly very slowly,
which is hard because in trauma,
you just want to be done with it.
You just want to get it over the way experience this anymore.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And so that would be my experience of slowly coming in,
coming home and it was somatic work.
Um The first had me where I was like,
oh,
I actually am owning my body again.
He Peter Levine does this felt sense exercise where you're like tracing one hand on the other hand.
And when I first did it like,
again,
that whole numbness,
like I really literally couldn't feel my hands touching each other and I knew that was probably weird.
But I was like,
but that's my normal,
right?
And there was parts of me that's like,
really,
like this is too woo do really?
People actually fill their hands like that.
Just been my experience for so long that I thought it was just crazy,
this whole idea.
Right.
And then I know people who feel so much that the idea of it not being overwhelming all the time is again foreign to them.
Right.
And so it's,
it's that being able to rein that in or for me being able to bring some of that up to finally,
you know,
I did that exercise and I remember there's a part at the end where he,
he says,
you know,
if I'm working on my left hand,
then he says,
like I get to then say the words of this is my left hand.
My left hand is part of my body and my left hand belongs to me.
And when I had that moment where I could actually feel sensation and then those words were tied to it for me,
that was the beginning of starting to reclaim my body because my trauma story had been for so long that my body is not my own,
which is why I had numbed out.
Right.
Yeah.
That's so beautiful.
You know,
I'm sitting,
I'm kind of tearing up because me too,
as I think about it.
Yeah,
like that,
that's really something that,
um,
that I hadn't considered,
um,
just that detachment and how,
learning how to reattach and to claim your,
the parts of your body or claim yourself can be so healing through that emotional um experience.
So,
wow.
Thank you for sharing that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Beautiful.
So,
um tell my listeners who you typically work with and maybe um one or however many you want things that you notice is you work with them and,
and you've kind of touched on some of them.
But if there's just,
what do you help them do and what do you notice that they're struggling with?
I'd love to explain that.
Yeah.
So I would say some of the biggest issues and things that I see that they're struggling with,
right?
When they come to me,
there's,
I guess there's kind of like two categories,
there's people who for sure know that they have trauma and they then have all these triggers that are constantly happening to them.
And so they feel this,
excuse me,
they feel this sense of helplessness and out of control,
right?
And then also there's all this fear coupled on because it's,
they don't know when the next trigger is going to come,
you know,
and then we respond differently whether we try to make sure that we're not around people in certain places that we know that will get triggered,
right?
So our lives start to change or we recognize that we've been doing that our whole life and we don't want to do that anymore,
you know,
type of a thing or we find that,
you know,
and it really just depends on what phase or state of survival that you go to.
Like,
if people who go to fight all the time,
they'll notice that.
Like,
you know,
they're constantly angry,
they're always picking a fight and looking for one,
even if it's not there,
you know,
type of a thing or they're always voicing their opinion,
always over other people,
you know,
type of a thing.
Um,
Or they're,
you know,
the,
the flea is the runaway,
right?
But in each,
all of these instances,
whether we're fighting,
fleeing,
freezing or doing that fawn,
um there's all of it has that helpless fear.
Like I can't stop this,
this is controlling me.
And so people come because they know they have these triggers,
they want to change them.
They lots of times they'll have these like,
you know,
I,
I recognize that I'm overreacting if you're in the fight or the flea response,
right?
Or I'm under reacting like I wish I would have said something if you're in the freeze or the fallen response or I said something,
but it's not what I really wanted to say.
I just said it because I knew they wanted me to say,
you know,
those type of things and starting to get,
wanting to get out of that.
So they're realizing they're over responding,
under responding.
Um And then the other group that comes are people who are like,
I just feel like I want to learn more about trauma.
Like,
I think maybe there's something there.
But really,
I'm just here for the education.
Right.
And I haven't found one client yet who's come to me with that who then doesn't realize,
oh,
lots of those usually are the little tea traumas.
Right.
That they're like,
oh,
so,
and they'll share something as we're working through these tools,
memories will come up and sometimes it'll just be like a snapshot real fast and they'll be like,
oh,
this is coming up.
I didn't remember that or I didn't know that this was tied and it's being able to have that safe space for somebody to share something and then be able for them to recognize their truth of,
oh,
that was actually really traumatic for me.
Like I felt in that moment that like the rug was pulled out from me or that I had to fragment myself in order to be able to keep functioning,
right?
That I had to compartmentalize type of a thing.
And so um those are some things that I have noticed and if you know,
people have come with each of those,
um that's kind of always the undercurrent there of I'm stuck.
I don't know how to move forward and I know that I need something,
right?
Oh That's so beautiful.
So,
how do you,
what would you say your process is like or what,
how do you help them now?
Stuck,
I guess.
Yeah.
So I would say that the first thing is kind of like a two fold is to first just start giving them trauma education so that they don't start minimizing their experience.
Right.
Because it's so easy when we come forward to them be like,
well,
mine's really not that bad.
Like,
I really probably shouldn't be here.
It really isn't,
you know,
this big of a deal,
someone else has it way worse and that again is just coping.
So it's starting to help them realize what their coping is,
how they're wanting to minimize it or say,
or even if it's just like,
fear,
like this is too scary.
So I'm going to minimize it,
right?
Like I don't want to go here.
And so it's just starting to help them understand trauma education,
understand that their body is responding in a normal way.
And then,
um kind of in the same vein,
I'm trying to do it almost at the same time because it's so powerful to start gaining and building trust within our body so that we can let our body speak to us and us learn to listen because like I said at the first,
right,
like our body really does know how to heal.
And so it's this learning tools to make it safe to go into our body,
to make it safe,
to be present with ourselves and even,
you know,
understand what that possibly means and,
and those are,
you know,
I have a basic foundation program.
That's a 16 week long program where I teach like one week we'll be teaching concepts of trauma.
And the next week we will be embodying it.
We'll be getting into our bodies,
we'll be finding ways to create this safety within and in trauma work,
they call it internal resourcing.
So we're finding these experiences that we are creating inside in also the same space in this external space,
right?
Because they're with me as their coach.
So now they have external resources,
internal resources where it's safe and where they can go back to those.
So it's this part of building capacity in our body to be able to go into the side of trauma,
right?
Because otherwise,
like we're so um our body won't let us go into trauma.
It won't tell us the information of the trauma because it's not safe.
So we are creating that space.
Does that makes sense?
Yeah.
Totally.
So beautiful.
So do you find like as you've worked with people?
Um do you find that they can naturally do that or does it,
is it take time?
Like what do you notice as,
I mean,
it in discovering all of this?
Yeah.
Yeah.
It definitely takes time,
right?
But it,
it's amazing to me.
It's always around like the 56 week mark of my program that they start to have this shift of starting to be like,
oh,
it's not as scary as I thought it would be or,
oh,
I,
I actually can see how I'm trusting myself.
I actually can see how there's parts of me.
Um,
you know,
and I do like this inner child work and parts were kind of interwoven in between two of like,
oh,
I actually have wisdom within me,
like this information.
Like I didn't even know I had and I know it came from me,
from this core within me and it's so cool because each person's journey is so different and so unique.
And I love just like,
you know,
as a coach,
you know,
that we don't,
we don't have an agenda,
right?
We don't like give our clients something.
And it's the same thing in this coaching space around trauma is that like I give them certain tools and their body just responds and it's amazing.
And I,
I offer um like four main body based modality tools and we start because like each person's body will respond differently,
right?
So I offer,
I give them like the somatic we do what's called poly vagal um which really helps you get into your different states of survival in the nervous system.
We do chakra and yoga work and meditation type things,
right?
Um And we do then like the subtle body,
which is again,
like getting into that energy cycle type stuff of our body and just really being able to,
you know,
I just give little pieces and we find out which ones they are drawn to and which one their body responds to.
And then we use that one kind of consecutively for the first little bit before we start adding more in.
Right.
So it's really cool to just let each person's body respond to the one that speaks to them.
And I've been amazed every single time my clients will remember something from their past of how they're like,
oh,
I did something similar to this when I was a little kid,
right?
Their body was trying to regulate them,
regulate their experiences and they didn't understand and didn't know.
So then to be able to,
so then it's oh yeah,
you already have that internal resource from when you were a kid.
Now,
let's explain how that's working and use that same type thing with these modalities.
And it is so beautiful to watch.
It's awe inspiring to me.
That is so cool.
You know,
I think that um those of us that maybe aren't immersed in this,
in the trauma and that kind of healing just to hear that like it just sounds so beautiful to see the power that the body has.
Yeah,
so cool.
It's amazing.
So cool.
Is there anything else that you want?
Like do you see where people stumble as you work with them?
Are there areas that are harder maybe than others as they move through this experience?
Yeah.
So,
you know,
each person is a little different.
It really depends like um,
if it's hard,
you know,
if they've dissociated for a long time,
then it is really hard for them to trust the process of getting into their body.
Right.
So,
we do much smaller baby steps.
Um,
and then there's some people who,
um,
you know,
those are people who have dissociated and numbed out and have gone very much into the freeze and the fawns.
So,
especially with fawning,
it's really important to help them start using their voice,
right?
To really help them start being able to even to me to really use language to express this,
even if it's like,
I can't really explain this,
but this is kind of what's happening,
right?
Like just really honoring that.
Um And then when people who feel a lot who often go into that flight or that flee,
right?
Where they already are really activated and have a lot of hyper vigilance and things like that,
right?
Their stumbling block then is being able to um let the mindful calm come in,
be able to get into their,
their top when the bottom is trying to take over.
And so it's the tool to be able to help regulate so that they have access to their prefrontal cortex,
access to their wisdom of their body.
That is a language that's not controlled by this hyper vigilant mobility type of a state.
It depends on the survival trauma state that is your go to and knowing that each situation can be different for me,
certain relationships,
like with my kids,
for instance,
I go into the fight mode with my kids a lot where with my husband and my family of origin,
I go into the fawn and the freeze response and then with my in laws,
I go into the flea response.
Right.
So it really is just starting to recognize different relationships.
We respond differently and being able to start owning like,
oh my trauma did that and it doesn't mean it's an excuse.
But now I have information and because it did that now I know different type things that I can do for that instance.
But knowing that that will work here,
but it doesn't work over here and being OK with that,
right?
Yeah,
I think the word that was popping into my mind is want.
It's just this the nuance of it all.
It's just right,
like everybody's different and there's just so many nuances to the process.
So it sounds like you have a lot of um knowledge and resources that will help people as they navigate this trauma in their life.
I just think that is so beautiful.
Oh,
thank you.
So beautiful.
So,
is there anything that you would love to share with the audience?
Yeah,
for sure.
Yeah.
One thing I would love to offer is just kind of offering this um this new narrative,
right?
Of like of the whole ands and both,
right,
which I do find that like women in the midlife and it's their seasons that,
that it just generally starts to happen,
right?
So just knowing that like it makes sense that like trauma or these realizations would be coming now instead of earlier,
right?
Like,
and just in general trauma education,
like it's very common for trauma to come back 2030 40 years after it first happens,
right?
And then so just kind of like that information,
right?
Of like,
it makes sense,
whatever you're experiencing and also to,
um,
start to get present,
which is one of those somatic experiencing type tools,
right?
And so something I would offer is to just give yourself the pa the space to pause for just a moment and to take a deep breath,
just a big inhale and an Excel and just kind of notice,
um,
like where that breath goes.
So,
do you mind if we just do a quick,
I would love to exercise together.
Ok.
Perfect.
Yeah.
So I love to just pause for a moment.
So if I was to pause and just like I was feeling overwhelmed or I was feeling burned out or I was just feeling like I didn't really respond how I wanted to,
you know,
lots of times we think that as our kids are growing older,
they're becoming adults and we're like,
ah,
I didn't really talk to them the way I would want to.
Right.
And just like,
as that settles in for a minute,
this uncomfortableness to just be able to pause for a moment and to look around your space for just a minute minute,
whether that be in your home outside,
we call it orienting in pavel work and then to go ahead and just take an inhale.
So I invite you to do that.
Just an inhale and an XL have and then just notice,
where did that inhale go?
And that exhale,
was it solely in your chest?
Did it fill up your rib cage?
Did it go into your belly?
And then just,
and maybe you didn't even notice you just took a breath,
right?
So again,
I invite you to take another inhale and an exhale and notice where the breath goes this time.
So another inhale and an XL and just notice where it filled up.
So just for you,
Jill,
where did that fill up?
Where did your breath go?
The first time we did that,
I noticed it was like most of my chest and then I noticed a little like after belly or something.
And the second time when I really was with it,
it,
it did fill up my chest and my belly.
It just really expanded that second time.
Yeah.
Nice.
Yeah.
So that's just like I noticed like when we get into our body in that space,
we literally because we're listening to our body and paying attention to it.
We're not thinking about all the things that we were just thinking about,
right?
And so it is able to pull us into this narrow focus that we need,
that is all about self and connecting with self before we then decide who we want to be in the world and how we want to show up in the world.
Right?
And then like,
I would then do lots more exercises and we would practice putting it in different places and really go into that.
What we kind of did where we paid so much attention to where the breath went is somatic work where you're feeling from the inside out,
right?
And so then we would kind of follow some of those sensations a little bit,
but that's just one that's really fast,
easy to do it any time to come back home to ourselves.
Yeah.
And I love,
um,
another thing Camy does,
I've noticed on her Instagram is you'll often do,
let's get into our bodies and walk people through a short exercise that helps,
um,
kind of self regulate.
Yes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And it's the great thing about that is that it's like it helps anybody whether you're actively in trauma,
right?
Or just you just need to regulate,
right?
So it helps if you're being,
you know,
like we talk about the top down,
meaning like you have a thought that will then cause a feeling and you can regulate that way.
You have like this bottom up from trauma,
right?
Where your body sensation causes something and then you might have a thought about that.
Right?
But like those get into your body,
all of those being present do help you whatever it might be that's coming on.
But yeah,
I do do those.
Um they come out either Mondays or Tuesdays.
Awesome.
I love it and I love how you said,
just pause if that's something that I try to teach my clients too.
And Victor Frankl,
right?
Talks about that space between stimulus and response is where agency is and we really want to access our full agency.
We have to allow for that pause.
That's where choice is made.
Yeah.
So I just love that.
The whole idea of a pause.
I just,
I love it.
So and real quick,
I just want to offer like that is part of the issue with trauma is like when trauma is in our system and everything from the past and you know,
it gets stacked on top of each other,
right?
So everything from the past comes into our present,
like we have lost choice because now we're just acting from survival,
right?
And so these body based tools helps us get that pause back.
Oh I love that.
You clarified that.
Yeah,
because someone that has experienced something traumatic.
Yeah,
their body is the one is is sensing the safety or the the not the danger or the unsafe,
right?
That's a word,
right?
So yeah,
I love how,
yeah,
so there,
there it's,
it's teaching you how to create that pause again.
So beautiful.
So we talk about like recreating a healthy nervous system,
right?
Because you want your body's survival to come online.
It is there to protect you when it's over in overuse,
it's not actually able to protect you,
right?
So we need to take away the trauma from that nervous system so it can be healthy and get those out of our bodies.
So,
yeah,
it's such a beautiful thing.
Yeah,
I love it.
You're doing such beautiful things.
Thank you.
So if people want to find you because I know that someone listening mean to this,
needed to hear this today.
Oh,
I don't know why someone to hear this today.
Yeah.
So for providing the space for that.
Yeah.
So how can they find you?
How can they connect with you?
Share all that?
Yeah,
for sure.
Yeah.
So I have my website which is Cammy Birdno.com and I think you'll have links for all of these too.
They'll be in the show notes.
OK?
Yeah.
And then I'm on Instagram and Facebook at Cammy Birdno Coaching.
Um I have a linkedin account as well.
And then my podcast,
I have my podcast,
which is the name of my program,
which is go all in to let go.
And so I have episodes in there.
Um And then,
yeah,
I also have,
you know,
some freebies.
I have um um three step process to heal.
That kind of goes into more depth about the bottom up,
the top down and the sideways.
And you know,
I give information as well as there's videos and that I give you tools and we practice,
right?
So you can kind of see my style.
Um And that and then yes,
my on my Instagram and Facebook,
I do that get into your body for a minute,
you know,
each week that has just like these great tools and free resources.
I am going to be doing a kind of a bigger version of that in March.
Well,
I where I will do a five day challenge where there will be,
you know,
well,
five days get into our body in a little bit more depth than just a minute.
So you can follow that on my socials and be able to get the,
you know,
tune in for that for when each of those are.
But yeah,
and then yeah,
definitely join my newsletter.
It's wacky,
wonderful Wednesday.
And I give it lots of tips in there too each week,
you know,
for different tools that you can use.
And,
and I try to give so many different varieties again because I know our bodies are so unique and being able to like just like if you look at something and it doesn't resonate like that's fine.
Know that like your body is bleeding,
you,
you really can trust your body's wisdom.
It knows how to heal and it will perk up for the things that it needs so you can trust that.
I love it so much.
Thank you so much for coming on and sharing.
Sharing your goodness.
Yeah.
Thank you so much for asking me and I appreciate it so good.
Thank you so much for listening.
If you like what you hear,
I would love it if you would share it with your friends and family and leave me a rating and review.
If you'd like to learn more about what life coaching is,
please schedule a free discovery call with me where we can work together through something that's causing you a problem.
Just go to my website Seasons coaching.com.
And you can also find information about my Seasons of Joy,
one on one coaching program and my Seasons of Joy community have a joyful week and I'll see you next time.
